An Interview With Zoe The Fabulous Feline

Q: Hi Zoe, how are you today?
Hello, Aoibha. I’m pretty excited, actually. My human’s been away and she just got home. I’ve missed giving her little love bites! The male human we live with is ok, but his skin does not taste as good as Emily’s. And he’s not as soft, either.
Q: Where did you get your fabulous name?
I first met my human when she came to the animal shelter with her daughter, who had gone there to adopt a cat she’d seen online. My human was just going along for the ride, but her daughter was pretty wise; she brought along two cat carriers…to pick up one cat. I spied Emily looking at me and gave her a fabulous grin. I was tweaking and rolling around and being very playful as well as vocal. She turned her back to me to talk to her daughter for a minute–that was as long as she could stay away from my fabulousness, but just to be sure, I tapped her on the shoulder. It was all over then. For her, that is. On the ride home, Emily and her daughter talked about how full of life I was, even in that small cage. Hence, they came up with Zoe, which is Greek for “life.” I came up with the “Fabulous” part.
Q: How long have you lived with Emily for?
That fateful day at the shelter took place just about eight years ago. When I got to my new home, I continued to bounce off the walls, literally; in fact, once I jumped up on the computer desk hutch and then jumped down again, using Emily’s head as a trampoline. Just to ensure she knew who was boss. They had indeed picked the right name for me! I also continued my antics of rolling around and growling. Emily finally realized that this was not just being playful. I was in heat, in my time, if you know what I mean. That prompted a fast visit to the vet. Things in that department have not been quite the same since. :::SIGH:::
Q: WHat’s your favourite food?
I’m not too picky–like SOME four-leggeds I know (who shall go nameless, but let’s just say he used to sell his soul for hot dogs, but now he’s all about turkey slices and only turkey slices…like I said, picky–picky!). However, there are some things I will not eat. I refuse to eat any human food. And I love crunchy cat treats…many and often!
Q: Do you go on lots of adventures?
Not as many as I would like. My human has successfully kept me as an indoor cat. And there are only so many adventures one can have in a house with two tired, old humans. So my stories usually come from a small bit of truth about something I hear (or witness) around here and then the rest I…let’s say…embellish. Of course, all of my tales about outdoor adventures are fantasies, but shhh…it’s our secret, ok?
Q: What was the funniest thing that had ever happened to you?
I don’t know if this is “to” me but it certainly was funny FOR me! My human would prefer I not sleep on her bed. She used to let me, but something about the hair making her feel “stuffy,” whatever that means. I don’t get it. I mean, she still lets me snuggle with her when she’s anywhere else, but not on the bed. So now she keeps the door to the bedroom closed at all times. The funniest thing (well, it was fun for me) was when one day she opened the door and didn’t expect me to be sitting there. Of course I bolted into the forbidden room! It was such fun….first she tried to coax me out, trying to sneak up on me to pick me up, but I was too fast for her. I jumped up on the tall dresser, and then jumped down on the bed, and when she tried to get me off, I jumped down and ran under the bed. In the end, though, she won by default. After a run-in with the Dust Bunnies living there, I wanted nothing more than to be out of there. But I controlled myself, and walked out on my terms, with my head and tail high, my dignity intact. I did get a treat, though, and she called me a “good girl”….hmmm, now that was interesting!
Q: Do you like lizards?
I like Spikey!  I kinda wish his name was “Spike” so I could’ve been cute and said, “I like Spike!”
Q: Has Emily done anymore amazing paintings?
I think she has done more paintings. Whether they are amazing is for others to decide. Me? I just love to watch her get all messy and frustrated! When she makes a mistake (often), she mutters something that sounds like “truck”….sometimes she mutters it loudly.
Q: How old are you?
I am ageless. I have nine lives, so age is irrelevant. (Sorry, Aoibha. Emily tells me that is quite a rude answer. OK, in this life, I guess I’m about 8 years old. Emily is nodding yes.)
Q: What time do you usually get up at?
No set time. I just go with the fabulous flow. Sometimes I sleep at night. Other times I sleep all day and then prowl around at night, opening the kitchen cabinet doors so that when my human gets up in the morning, she blames the male human. I can’t help it; they keep me indoors so I have to do something for fun! What time does Scourge get up?
Q: Did you like these questions?
Meooooowie! Yes, they were fun! And YOU are my first interview.
Q: Thanks so much for taking the time to talk to us today, you really are fabulous!
Thank you, Aoibha, for inviting me over. (I’ll let you in one one other thing, another secret: My human’s a good egg and I really do love her! I show her now and then, too, but I have to poke her a lot too. Because, as a feline, I have to maintain the upper paw, you know what I mean?)
Zoe, as from her title is a fabulous feline who lives with her owner Emily Gmitter. Zoe writes a blog about herself and Emily and all the mischief she gets up to. She’d love if you could check it out. Thanks for reading! Bye for now!
~AoibhaWalsh2017

A Further Interview With Andrew Joyce & Danny The Dog

Today, we’re sitting down with the authors Andrew Joyce and Danny the Dog for a joint interview. Andrew is the author of Yellow Hair and Danny writes a monthly column to keep his legions of fans informed as to his latest adventures. So, without further ado, let’s get started.

Thank you for agreeing to do this interview.

AJ: It’s a pleasure to be here.

DtD: Me too . . . I guess.

 

Tell me a little about yourselves and your backgrounds?

AJ: I’m a writer, which surprises me greatly. For the first three years of my writing career, I never referred to myself as a writer. It was only when the royalties started coming in and I could quit my day job that I dared think of myself as such.

DtD: I’m a dog.

What book or books have had a strong influence on you and/or your writing?

AJ: The works of Louis L’Amour and Robert B. Parker.

DtD: The genius writings of Danny the Dog.

AJ: Excuse me, Aoibha, but I need to speak to Danny for a minute.

AJ: What are you doing, Danny? You don’t seem to be taking this interview seriously. You’re giving one-word answers and when asked about your favorite authors, you say “yourself”. I know all us writers think of ourselves as our favorite author, but you’re not supposed to say that out loud.

DtD: Whatever! May we continue with the inquisition?

AJ: I’m sorry, Aoibha.

 

That’s okay, Andrew. Danny and I understand one another. So let’s carry on. Going back to the beginning, what is it that got you into writing?

AJ: One morning, about six years ago, I went crazy. I got out of bed, went downstairs, and threw my TV out the window. Then I sat down at the computer and wrote my first short story. I threw it up on the Internet just for the hell of it, and a few months later I was notified that it was to be included in a print anthology of the best short stories of 2011. I even got paid for it! I’ve been writing ever since.

DtD: One day, about five years ago, Andrew went out and left the computer on. He was always complaining about how hard it is to write anything decent, so I thought I’d show him how easy it is when one has talent. Is that a long enough answer for you, Andrew?

 

Tell us a little bit about your writing process.

AJ: I prefer to write in the early morning hours when things are quiet. I usually get up around 2:00 a.m. and go to work. The commute is not long . . . only a few steps to my computer.

DtD: I have to wait until Hemingway over there goes to bed.

AJ: By any chance are you referring to me?

DtD: Yes, but only in an ironic way.

AJ: You see what I’ve got to put up with?

 

Now boys, play nice. You are both professionals. What would your fans think?

AJ: You’re right. I’m sorry.

DtD: I’m the only one with fans around here. I’d say that Andrew’s been riding my coattails for years—if I had coattails. But for your sake, I’ll try to be well-behaved.

 

That’s a good doggie. Do either of you have any hobbies? Or anything you like to do in your spare time?

AJ: I like to read history and do research for my next book. I also like to watch old movies from the 1930s and ’40s.

DtD: My hobby is looking after His Nibs here. I’m always getting him out of trouble or bailing him out of jail after one of his benders. I call him Hemingway because he drinks like Ernie did. You should see ol’ Andrew when he’s had a snoot full.

 

What are you two working on at the moment?

AJ: This interview.

DtD: Ditto

AJ: High five, Danny.

DtD: Next question, please.

AJ: Hey, Danny. Don’t leave me hangin’.

DtD: Pleeease, Aoibha, the next question!

 

How do you develop your plots and your characters? Do you use a set formula?

AJ: I usually sit down to write a book with no idea where my characters will lead me. I start out with (I hope) a killer first sentence and the last paragraph of the book. Then I set out to fill the in-between space with 100,000 words. I find that the easy part. Sometimes I will bring my characters to a certain place, only to have them rebel when we get there. They’ll tell me they want to go somewhere else and take off on their own. I have no choice but to follow.

DtD: That was a pretty artsy-fartsy answer.

AJ: Was not.

DtD: Was too.

AJ: Was not!

DtD: Was too. Was too. Was too!!!

 

Boys! If you can’t behave, I’ll have to end the interview. As a child, Andrew what did you want to be when you grew up? And, as a puppy, Danny, what did you want to do?

AJ: I never wanted to grow up, and I believe I have succeeded.

DtD: I think he has, too. As a puppy, I only wanted to survive Andrew.

 

What would we find under your bed?

AJ: The monster that lives there.

DtD: When it thunders, me (and Andrew’s monster).

 

If you could travel into the past or future, where would you want to go? Why?

AJ: Egypt. I’d like to see the Great Pyramid being built.

DtD: The caveman days. I think it would be super-duper to be in a time before dogs allowed themselves to be “domesticated.”

 

What has been your worst or most difficult job?

 

AJ: Some jobs I’ve had in the past have been real doozies. I’ve done back-breaking physical labor. I’ve worked as a waiter for a short spell and hated every minute of it. I worked with and breathed in chemicals that have done a number on my lungs. But the worst job I ever had was when I was eighteen. I worked at a McDonalds for one day. At the end of the shift, I walked out never to return. I didn’t care about the pay I was owed or anything else. I just wanted out of there.

DtD: Looking after Andrew.

 

What group did you hang out with in high school?

AJ: I had no friends in high school. Still don’t . . . come to think of it.

DtD: At last . . . Andrew has said one true thing! I, of course, had no need of schooling. I was born brilliant. Not to mention wonderful, marvelous, and good looking.

 

What is something that you absolutely cannot live without?

DtD: If you don’t mind, Aoibha, I’ll field this one for both of us. For Andrew, it’s vodka. For me it’s Andrew.

AJ: Aw shucks, Danny.

Thank you for stopping by. It’s been a little different. However, I believe we’ve learned a few things about your writing processes . . . and other things as well.

AJ: Thank you for having us

DtD: Yeah, it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be.

So there we go folks, another amazing interview from Andrew and his sidekick Danny. Those two are quite the comical bunch! Don’t forget to check out Andrew’s amazing books on Amazon. You won’t regret it. And don’t forget to check out Danny’s blog. I’m sure you’ll get quite a few giggles out of it!

 

An Interview With Fantastic Author, Andrew Joyce

Q: Hi Andrew, I hope your days going good 

I can’t complain. Well, I could and I do, but it doesn’t do any good. 

Q: I’ve heard you live in a beautiful marina, what a lovely place to spend your days! 

I don’t know how beautiful it is, but it’s on the water. I like living on the water. When it’s windy you get rocked to sleep just like when you were a baby. 

Q: Does Danny get seasick by any chance? 

Danny is an old salty dog. He has his sea legs—sometimes even better than me. 

Q: When did you publish your first book and how long did it take? 

I published my first book in 2013. With the writing, editing, and finding an agent, it took about nine months. Since then each of my books take about a year of my time. That’s writing, editing, and marketing. 

Q: Does Danny review your books after you’re finished them? 

I couldn’t write a book without Danny’s help. His syntax so much better than mine. 

Q: What’s Danny’s favourite movie? 

Lassie Comes Home. 

Q: Did Danny get his hotdog today? 

Danny gets his hotdog every day or there’s hell to pay! 

Q: Are you happier now with what you produce? 

I’ve grown as a writer, but I’m never happy because I’m always comparing myself to John Steinbeck. I think he was the best writer that every lived. 

Q: How hard was it to get published? 

I queried 3,000 agents! Ten hours a day, seven days a week it was go through the lists, get their emails, cut and paste my letter, and then send it out. One full year!!! 

I was pushing my first book, a 164,000 word mess. It was a good story, but I had no concept of proper editing. Anyway, I was told time and time again that anything over 80,000 words for a first time author was heresy. Finally, I got pissed off and sat down and wrote an 80,000 novel just as a big FU. Then I sent out queries. Lo and behold, within a month I had a contract with one of the biggest agencies in the country. 

By the way, a query is a letter you send to agents telling them about your book and hoping they’ll be interested enough to ask for a sample (a few chapters). Then you hope they’ll love it so much that they’ll sign you to a contract and then go out and sell your book to a big publishing house and come back with a check for a million dollars.  

Q: How did you come up with the ideas for your first book? 

I had just finished reading Mark Twain’s Huckleberry Finn for the third time, and I started thinking about what ever happened to those boys, Tom and Huck. They must have grown up, but then what? So I sat down at my computer, banged out Redemption: The Further Adventures of Huck Finn and Tom Sawyer in two months. 

Q: Have you a favourite choice of your books? 

I think the best book that I have written so far is Resolution: Huck Finn’s Greatest Adventure. 

Q: Who’s your inspiration? 

John Steinbeck, Louis L’Amour, Jack London, and Robert B. Parker among others. 

Q: What do you do in your spare time? 

Take walks with Danny 

Q: Was your literary journey worth all the effort? 

Sure it was. I had nothing else to do. 

Q: Thanks so much for answering these questions today. I hope you enjoy the rest of your evening! 

Thank you for having me over and Danny says hi. 

 

Andrew Joyce lives on a boat in a beautiful marina with his canine companion and sidekick, Danny the dog. They both have their own blogs and they would more than love if you could check them out! Thanks for reading this interview! Bye for now!
~AoibhaWalsh2017

 

Danny Looking Good.jpg
All paws on deck for Andrew’s fabulous canine sidekick, Danny!
Andrew Working.jpg
Andrew Joyce working